Welcome, Urban! This yummy dessert was made by my friend, Sheryl! Thanks, Sheryl! It is delicious!
I have gotten several people that have emailed wanting to know more details of our birth experience here. We had so many people praying for us and those prayers were truly felt. So here is a very long version of our experience if you are interested:
First of all, the closer we got to my due date the more anxiety I felt about this birth. I really struggled trusting that God would get me through this delivery, the timing of when I would deliver, and a lot of fears about delivering in a foreign country. So needless to say, many prayers were pled and tears were shed the last few weeks before Urban’s birth. On a side note, it was about a month or so before the birth that we discovered that there were no options for pain such as an epidural. This was a big surprise to me because we had asked about this last summer when touring the hospital and somehow we had understood that there was. Anyways, needless to say, my only option was to have a natural birth, which was really scary for me. I had a ton of fears! It would be completely opposite of what I experienced with Asher. I felt totally overwhelmed not only by the cultural differences here and giving birth in such a different environment, but now I had to do it without any drugs! So I spent the last month or so reading a lot on natural birth.
Originally, by my calculations, (which I wasn’t sure were accurate), I had thought my due date was July 25th. At my 12 week ultrasound my doctor had moved my due date to the 19th of July. I was really hoping that Urban would arrive around that time, but the 19th roled around and there was no signs of baby coming.
On Friday, July 23rd, I went in for an appointment. I was now 4 days overdue according to my doctor’s calculations and she wanted to induce me that afternoon. We said we’d like to wait. I was very apprehensive about being induced when no pain options or epidural were available. My doctor made very clear to us that it was our risk to take and she was not responsible for this decision. I was quite stressed, but felt that if I had to have this baby without pain meds, I really wanted to wait for my body to start labor on its own. At the same time, I was growing weary of being pregnant and knew the pressure from my doctor to induce would only get more difficult with the passing days. I also felt the weight of not wanting to make a decision that would be harmful or risky to our baby. So I was desperately praying that this baby would come soon.
At my appointment that day my doctor stripped my membranes and said she wanted to see me again on Saturday for a non stress test for the baby. We agreed to that. We went home and around 1:00pm that afternoon I started have a lot of back pain and contractions. They continued all day and were consistently 5-6 minutes apart. By 11:00pm that night they were very strong, but never got closer together. I kept thinking that this could be it, but they should get closer together. So I labored at home. Reed and I were up all night. I tried many different comfort measures: walking, sitting, lying on my side, sitting in the tub, sitting on a pilates ball, but none were super effective. I think just breathing through each one helped me to at least remain calm. By 2:30am my contractions were hard enough that I could not talk or walk through them, so Reed packed up our things and we were ready to go. I decided to wait a little longer because they still were 5 minutes apart and not getting any closer, but very intense. I kept thinking surely they would get a bit closer together. I didn’t want to get to the hospital too early, considering there were many stressful variables involved with that (Reed possibly not being able to be in the room, language and culture barriers, etc.) . So we decided to wait a bit. By morning they had slowed all the way down to 10-15 minutes apart, but were still very painful.
So we didn’t go to the hospital. I was super discouraged and wondered if all of that pain was just false labor . I didn’t know what a natural labor was like, so I was nervous that all that pain and work wasn’t true labor yet. Throughout Saturday I still had very painful contractions, but they were even more irregular coming every 15 to 20 minutes. Reed and I were both so worn out from the night before and discouraged that this wasn’t it. We tried to go get my non stress test that afternoon, but didn’t realize that the hospital closed early that day. So we went back home thinking that we had more days to wait.
That evening my contractions picked up again, but still only coming every 5 min and not getting closer together. We tried to watch “Castaway” until I could no longer take it and could not be distracted any longer. At 11:00pm that night, I had a couple of contractions that were almost 2 minutes long and right on top of each other. At that point, we decided to go to the hospital. I still wasn’t sure if this was the real thing, but was praying that it was. We called our friends, took Asher over there to sleep the rest of the night, and my friend Sheryl came with to the hospital.
We are only 10 minutes from the hospital, so not a long drive, but the roads aren’t great. Reed had to pull over during a contraction, because it was too uncomfortable to get through it on bumpy roads. We got to the hospital and the nurse checked me right away and said I was dilated to about a 7. This was a huge relief to me. The nurse said I would probably have this baby in an hour. I didn’t want to get my hopes up on that. I was so thankful to have my friend, Sheryl , there because for the first 35 minutes Reed had to fill out paper work, so Sheryl was with me. Also, she was able to translate everything for me, so I didn’t have to try to think about understanding Turkish at that point. The nurse broke my water shortly after laboring there for a few minutes. Things got very intense very quickly at this point. I was glad that I hadn’t arrived much sooner to the hospital because in those few short minutes of laboring they wanted me on my back and that was horrible. I was having a lot of back labor and couldn’t handle being on my back at that point. I was able to lay on my side for a little while which was better.
Anyways, all of this is happening in a 35 min. period. Reed finally arrives from filling out paper work and the nurse is really apprehensive about letting him in the labor room. This is culturally not something they do here. Sheryl let the nurse know that my doctor had approved it already. Another huge praise was that there was no other woman laboring at that time otherwise Reed would not have been able to be in the room with me.
So a few minutes after my water breaking, the nurse said it would be soon and told me to get up and walk over to the delivery room. Ha Ha! At this point I was in so much pain, I could not walk very well. I think Reed basically carried me across the hall. The pain of pushing was far beyond anything I have ever experienced before. I was so thankful that things were moving along fast at this point, but so frightened by the pain and intensity of it all. I pushed through about 4 contractions and my doctor arrived maybe 10 minutes before Urban was born.
It was an emotional moment and I honestly think I was more emotional because it was now over! This long awaited birth was finally done! So Urban Josiah was born 1 hour after arriving at the hospital (just as the nurse had predicted) on July 25 (Turkey time), which was my original due date. It was very confusing for people back home because it was still the 24th of July when we called to tell them.
We only have to stay at the hospital for 8 hours following a normal birth, so our stay was very short. We had to bring most things ourselves for the hospital stay: food, drink, baby clothes, diapers. Those things were not provided. Someone did come around with fresh bread and chai in the morning though! The nurse came in a few times in the 8 hours there to check on me and Urban, but really there wasn’t a lot of interaction with nurses and doctors following the delivery. In some ways it was nice to have the privacy, but in other ways, I missed the care and how pampered you are by the nurses in the States. I was thankful that it was my second child, and having all of the support that first time around with Asher as far as feeding, postpartum care, etc. It made this a little easier since less support was provided. It’s not that the hospital isn’t responsible or doesn’t care, but I think in this culture it would be your mom, sister, and aunts that would provide you with the care and help with breastfeeding, etc.
Here are a few pics of my hospital room:
Overall, I had a long labor at home, but it was broken up a bit and the deliver was fast. All in all, we were so thankful for the short time at the hospital, a healthy delivery, good medical staff, Sheryl: for her support and translating and the timing of it all. God answered so many prayers. Reed was able to be in the room, it was quick once we were at the hospital, I was able to endure labor by God’s grace, and we were blessed with a healthy son. God is good, trustworthy, and gracious to us. Thanks to so many who were praying through all those little details.
